|guinness world records man:||sir you have done nothing but do pushups from this one spot for 20 years with no rest. what drives you?|
|me, still doing pushups:||i wanna push this planet out of the idiot solar system and into the horrifying abyss of the unknown universe and this is the only way I know how|
|world records man, in awe:||[drops everything and instantly begins doing pushups next to me]|
If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.
Why the fuck would I do that
imagine if china, while they’re up on the moon, decides to knock down the US flag or whatever just to say ‘screw you’ and its like, what are we gonna do? spend a couple million just to fly some craft up to the moon and re-erect the flag? the whole scenario would be petty and that’s hilarious
i have lived in america my entire life and i am 100% sure we would do exactly that